Beating a dead horse

I was re-reading an e-mail I sent earlier today and came across a joke I made about my family. I started busting up. I must be a funny guy when I can make myself laugh through an e-mail loop. Anyway, here’s what I thought was so funny (written to my brother’s girlfriend):

“As for beating a dead horse, you’re dating a guy from a family of experts on the subject. You can just imagine this exchange from a farm back in ‘ol Scotland (make sure to add Scotish accents in your head):

Farmer: “I’m sory Mr. Crawford, but the horse has died.”
Mr. Crawford: “I’ll show you a dead horse (whip)!”

My brother thought it was hilarious and that’s probably because we both used the same voice for Mr. Crawford: Willie from the Simpsons. Yes?

6 Responses to “Beating a dead horse”

  1. Ken's Brother Says:

    actually it was more the dad from braveheart, seeing as how I *just* watched it with Sarah (her first time seeing it).

  2. Sarah Says:

    You are truly Brian’s brother if you are laughing at your own joke!

  3. kencraw Says:

    Ah, well that’s a good voice for Mr. Crawford as well. Although from you’ve told me, Mr. Crawford just missed making an appearance in the movie as Murron’s grandpa, right?

    Other voices from that movie that would work would be Steven the Irishman (despite being Irish), father Campbell and possibly Hamish Campbell.

    Ah, just thinking of it remindes me that it’s such a great movie… here’s one of my favorite exchanges:

    Stephen: [Speaking to himself] Him? That can’t be William Wallace. I’m prettier than this man.
    Stephen: [Speaking heavenward] All right Father, I’ll ask him.
    Stephen: [to William] If I risk my neck for you, will I get a chance to kill Englishmen?
    Hamish: Is your father a ghost, or do you converse with the Almighty?
    Stephen: In order to find his equal, an Irishman is forced to talk to God.
    Stephen: [Heavenward] Yes, Father.
    Stephen: [to William and the others] The Almighty says don’t change the subject; just answer the f***ing question.

    We sure he wasn’t a Crawford?

  4. kencraw Says:

    Sarah, why would someone tell a joke if they themselves didn’t find it funny?

  5. Ken's Brother Says:

    you bastard! you misquoted Braveheart! That’s sacrelidge where I’m from! It’s *ahem* “to find an equal an Irishman is forced to converse with the ALMIGHTY”

  6. kencraw Says:

    You’re right. That’s what I get for cutting a pasting the text from an unreliable source. Thankfully, where I come from sacrilege is forgiven once someone repents.